I made the looooong trip back home yesterday, following my family across 3 state lines and its definitely been a journey. I remember when I was in college and thought the world was at my fingertips, easy to achieve the high standard without trying- and as you can see I was waaaaay wrong. College was fun but I never took it seriously and fucked around with too many things to really focus on what and where I needed to go and do and I dragged a great friend and a great roommate into that (sorry Tori!!)
There are few things I really regret in life and taking advantage of bad situations is a big one and I can definitely say that dorm life is different than living on your own and living in your home. I’ve grown more in the last 4 months than I ever did in college and within reason. I’ve experience stupidity at its finest, the loss of someone you loved, deterioration of “lasting relations”, going daaaaayyysss without eating anything because I never had money, working nights to never being able to afford gas, learning the true value of what a dollar can buy you, fighting to stand against a man I thought I could trust with my blood and it all pieced together to form a new view on my situations.
I learned I wasn’t ready to do things on my own, wasn’t as mature or level headed as I had thought and it took a big smack in the face and stomp on the hand to really help me see that so… as an update:
I’ve been working to save up for emergencies, moved back home to cut down living expenses, couponing-price matching to save cash; falling short many times, have barely enough to pay my bills and have gas for my car, realizing that a box of cheez-its and a few apples can be a meal for the next 3 days (maybe some rice somewhere in there), found a guy who makes me laugh~ let me do mah shiz on my own king Strawberry!, and holding true to every promise and owning up to every mistake I’ve ever made.
Growing up sucks.